Hip-O-Crit.

Why is it that some people can talk freely about what is wrong with your children and the way you parent them; and when the tables are turned, when you tactfully point out some *discrepancies* in their parenting and some character flaws in their children, they feel flamed?

Walter and I have forever clashed on the finer points of childrearing. Seeing as how his children are functioning with divorced parents gives him leeway to 'explain away' their behavior. When finally, the dam bursts, and their behavior royally pisses him off, it's martial law, he screams, curses and downgrades his children. Then they go home to a mother who hails from the School of Wooden Spoon Discipline. No wonder his kids are so screwed up. Well, not the younger one, anyway. She still has a chance but I am not enthusiastic.

An in the mean time, he criticizes me for my parenting ideas. While I've been singlehandedly parenting my children for almost 6 years and have never claimed to be the Mary Poppins archetype, I know I've done a good job.

All this goes back to Memorial Day weekend. Walter had taken his kids and my son, Dylan, down to his sister's house in VA for a weekend of fun n sun. They come back and Dylan tells me that Walter's son, "Seth" had said a really hurtful comment about his (Dyl's) father, who's deceased. This, understandably, really struck home with Dylan and he told me about it, in private. Walter got pissed off that Dylan didn't come to him first. I said to Walter that Dyl didn't come to him because Walter probably would've blown him off. Do Walter's kids come to him about everything? NO! They go home to their mother and talk all sorts of trash about me and my family.

Dylan confides in me because he knows I listen. He doesn't confide in Walter because he knows he will blow him off. Simple.

All I can say is I am glad I have a son who talks to me because he knows I will see things as they are, a son who is kind and good-hearted, and not a hulking little brute who likes to bash heads.