Surgeon! Surgeon!

This is me last night after an attempt to gut a pumpkin. Gourd-inflicted karma at its finest.

OK. So I didn't really cut off my hand.

I was cutting the top off with the old-fashioned serrated bread knife. This was after I had purchased a Pumpkin Master Power Saw™ in order to lessen the time. Savvy, eh? I have been gutting pumpkins for years and never once had so much as a nick. I am no virgin, any mo, any mo. Left hand is holding down top of pumpkin while right hand saws away. I make the final gouge, withdrawl the knife and schhhhick! I'm cut. I stare with childlike curiosity at the hole in the web of my left hand. There's something white in there! A tendon? A bone? Neat-o! Then the blood bubbles forth like a gentle reminder that I'm standing here with a hole in my hand, and shouldn't I do something about it? Oh. Yeah. I run Dylan over to the neighbor's house and go to the emergency room. Three hours, two stitches and one tetanus shot later, I'm home and the sonovabitch is throbbing because the lidocaine wore off. My hand feels like Studio 54 in full swing. I think there's a mosh pit somewhere in there, too.

Folks, every 10 seconds in this country, a pumpkin is gutted and a finger severed, cut open, sacrificed, etc....Be safe this All Hallows' Eve season, everyone.

I did get the pumpkins finished after my hand stopped hurting. They look great! Thank you Power Saw™! I will post pics of them when they are developed.

WTF did I tell them I didn't remember when my last tetanus shot was?! Can't--move--my--arrrrrrm!